A psychologist looks at the dark side of pop culture
— and how parents can protect their kids from it

Target: children

Psychologist and author Dr. Jim Taylor has spent more than 20 years working with children, parents and educators in a variety of settings. His new book, “Your Children Are Under Attack” (Sourcebooks, $18.95), takes on violent video games, reality TV and other unsavory aspects of popular culture — and how worried parents can cope with such influences.

Are there any positive aspects of popular culture nowadays?

First of all, let me say that not all popular culture is bad, and I make a point of that in the book. My concern is when popular culture teaches unhealthy values, is physically unhealthy, and becomes the guiding force in kids' lives. There are many wonderful books, movies and even video games that can be very beneficial, but an underlying aspect of popular culture is that it usually involves sitting on one's butt. That keeps kids from physical activity and from ­doing other things that are probably healthier. I'm not ­saying there should be a law against popular ­culture. It simply needs to be ­balanced. Parents really need to study popular culture and see beyond the superficial messages. Parents are intelligent people, and they know what these ads and ­video games and movies are trying to sell, but they don't really connect how bad it is. To 6-, 7- and 8-year-old kids, it's not so obvious. They simply don't have the tools yet to be able to think critically.
One thing I really emphasize with kids is teaching them healthy skepticism. We don't want them naive, because then they'll believe everything. We don't want them cynical, because then they don't trust anything. But parents should want their kids to not take these messages at face value.

Is there a particular aspect of popular culture that is most destructive?

First is the overwhelming presence of popular culture. Every day, kids are bombarded with unhealthy messages. But as far as blatant destructiveness, it would have to be video games, where the messages about violence and sexuality are just profoundly unhealthy — of course, not all video games, but just the most popular ones.

Why are games such as “Grand Theft Auto” so much more appealing than, say, sports games?

It's an act of rebellion, and asserting power over their world — and the fact is, it's incredibly stimulating. It's an adrenaline rush. “Going to the dark side” is incredibly alluring for kids. That's the cool thing, although so unhealthy.

Who is more to blame, parents or the marketers who propagate these kinds of messages?

I don't really blame the marketers. They're just fulfilling their existence. Their job is to make money. It'd be like asking a fish not to swim. Would I like to have some sense of social responsibility from them? Sure. Do I expect it of them? No.
It is ultimately the parents' responsibility, and that is the fundamental message in the book — that they're not going to get any help from business, and they're certainly not going to get any help these days from our government; they have long ago sold out to special interests and money. The three ­places where kids can really get support are their schools, their houses of worship and, most basically, from their parents.

So what are some of the basic things that parents can do?

It starts with clearly understanding what parents value, and make sure those values are healthy. Unfortunately, parents are just as easily seduced by popular culture as their kids are. Remember, who buys these video games? The parents do. There's a parenting culture of laziness and expediency, rather than figuring out some fun games.
So it starts with getting parents to understand what they value, and then to make deliberate decisions about what's in their children's best interests. I talk a lot in my book about that notion of “best interest” — what will then enable them to become successful, happy, value-driven, compassionate kids, instead of, “nah, that's easier,” or “we'll just do drive-thru McDonald's” or “I don't have the time, let's just do what everyone else in the neighborhood is doing.”
Teaching values is not just a one-shot deal or occasional thing. It's talking about them, living them, giving children experiences from these values every ­single day. That doesn't mean you can't ever go to McDonald's or ever play a video game — that's just not realistic in our culture.
But as long as the parents are making mostly good decisions for their kids — and the emphasis there is “mostly,” not “perfect” — they'll come out okay.

Julian Kesner
16 March 2005

http://www.nydailynews.com/city_life/health/story/290384p-248470c.html

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