BOTSWANA VIEW

Women Also Abuse Children

Monday Meeting continues with the theme of domestic violence. The previous instalment centred on the 16 Days of Activism for No Violence Against Women and Children, with violence against women being the subject of discussion. This week the focus shifts to children. No right thinking person can deny the fact that children a) constitute the most vulnerable section of any society; and that b) the future well - being of any society depends on the healthy development of its children.

Needless to say, children start life as totally dependent beings that need special protection, care and guidance.

It is against this background that the United Nations International Children's Emergency Fund (UNICEF, an inter-governmental organisation devoted specifically to the rights of children, was set up in 1946. Its name was later on shortened to United Nations Children's Fund but the original acronym was kept. Children are entitled to all rights guaranteed by the Universal Declaration of Human Rights and the treaties that have developed from it such as the UN Declaration on the Rights of the Child; the UN Convention on the Rights of the Child; the African Charter of the Rights and Welfare of the Child. Evidently, the international community has done a lot to give rights to children across the globe; it is now up to national governments to ensure that children's rights are observed and protected.

Given their vulnerability, wide-eyed innocence and total dependence on adults, violence against children ought to be the most abhorrent and despicable of all crimes. But do we really care as a society? It is well and good that violence against children by men be highlighted, but this is woefully inadequate when we sweep under the carpet violence perpetrated by women against children. Violence by mothers against their own children is so widespread it simply boggles the mind. Although some are exemplary parents, single mothers are the worst perpetrators. The following are examples:

l In an attempt to instil discipline in her children, the poor, beleaguered single mother frequently canes her children, which only worsens the situation as the children become rebellious and more ill - disciplined. Consequently, they drop out of school or don't do well at school and end up spending most of their adulthood in shebeens, in jail or walking the streets.

l And then we have those mothers who, being at the end of their tether as a result of raising children on their own, frequently lash out at their children in public for no apparent reason ("heela seso ke wena!", "sematla ke wena itlhaganele!"). This psychological abuse does not augur well for a child's self-esteem and confidence which are crucial for development of the child.

l There are those who abuse their own children through neglect. These are the boozers who frequent pubs, discos and shebeens whose children can be seen loitering the streets unwashed and hungry, and who, in an effort to survive, eventually turn into bo-bashi and low-class prostitutes at a very tender age.

l Single mothers with questionable morals subject their children to psychological abuse that has a direct bearing on the quality of their relationships with their partners as adults. These mothers have no qualms about their children being aware that they have multiple sex partners. The boy-child grows up believing that all women are incapable of being faithful and physically abuses his women without exception; and the girl-child grows up knowing that having multiple sex partners is a norm and her God-given right, and end up being frequently battered, or worse, killed by her partner.

l And then we have mothers who intentionally murder their own children. Not a week passes by without reports of innocent infants being abandoned and cold-heartedly left to die in the bush or thrown into pit latrines.

The maximum sentence for a capital crime is death by hanging, yet these murderers and would-be murderers are only given a slap on the wrist for these despicable crimes, which only serves to encourage more similar crimes instead of deterring them. In fact, given that it is innocent babies who never requested to be conceived in the first place that are being murdered, these crimes ought to elicit a national outcry louder than that arising from passion killings.

There is need to de-link violence against children from gender violence in order that violence perpetrated by women against children is highlighted and addressed. We will be failing our children if we continue sweeping this violence under the carpet.

Bugalo A. Chilume
January 9, 2006