PracticeHint  

To Stop or to Go?
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Julie was in her third year as a child and youth care worker. It had been a steady career as she moved through the training and the practical experience. One thing she had learned was that she definitely didn’t know everything! There were always new angles, new insights, new challenges. Like today ...

She was alone in the unit with the group of eight or nine adolescents one afternoon, preparing tea while waiting for a shift change. It was raining. The kids were already a bit grumpy, but now they gathered in the sitting room where it was less chilly. She listened from the kitchen as things began to warm up – no conflict or anything, but shouts of frolic and the odd thump as cushions were thrown. She moved quickly to the sitting room.

Chaos. Someone had thrown a cushion hard enough to knock one of the younger boys over, and soon it came back – with interest. The others cheered, and began to join in ...
Julie’s first thought was to yell out "Stop this! You’ll break something!" but she realised at once that she was neither big enough nor loud enough to make much of an impression. What to do?

She decided. She swept into the room – and with a whoop of delight, dived onto the overstuffed sofa in the middle of the room. The energy of the group followed her like a swarm of bees. Suddenly everyone seemed to be on the sofa, pushing and pulling, tickling and shrieking with laughter, abandoned to a minute or two of sheer fun.
Then Julie got to her feet, still laughing, and announced. "Hey, that was great. Let’s go get our tea now." And the whole group followed her enthusiastically to the kitchen.

*    *    *

Usually it’s easier (and better) to keep things going than to stop them. There is the brief moment of risk when we decide to join the ride, but then we’re aboard and we can steer the action from the inside instead of grouching on the outside. Julie showed creativity in her decision to join in, and skill in diverting the action which might have gotten out of control and more destructive. She used the energy which already existed in the game, and turned it into one of those positive memories which was good for everyone.

Think of some other situations in your practice where it would be better to keep something going than to kill it, to harness positive impetus than to suppress it.