The complete set of 198 Hints are available in paperback from the CYC-Net Press store.
Listen
Brendtro used the phrase "establishing relationship beachheads", Beedell talked of "remedial ego building" and Redl of "massaging numb values". These are all images of regaining territory which has been lost, rebuilding something which has broken down, of restoring circulation, feeling and function which have somehow been cut off.
Relationships, awareness, growth, sensitivity – all of these retreat in the face of hurt, anxiety, ineffectiveness or simple non-use. "What’s the use? Why should I try again?" asks the scared, angry or withdrawn child.
The child and youth worker’s main role is, through being alongside the young person, to represent ordinary humanity in its normal responsiveness, its usual interest, its standard tendency to explain and assist, its average capacity to share, to commiserate, to laugh. Previously the child’s normal explorations and interactions have been met with absence, unconcern, ignoring, silence, ridicule, forbidding, threat, punishment ... and in our daily work we simply normalise our responses to the child’s normal expressions of self.
The only part of this which is artificial is that a Child and Youth Care worker is interposed as a player in the child’s life so as to increase the probability of an everyday human response to what the child says or does.
The more serious the withdrawal, the longer this may take ... and this is the magic of Child and Youth Care: if it takes a while to restore the circulation and function, then we’re there for the duration; we make utmost use of our learning and special skills, our patience and commitment. But equally, we have all had the experience of the kids who, finding themselves in a rational and responsive human environment, are reassured and recover spontaneously, can pick up from where they left off and can get on with their lives. And we are trained to know the difference – when the extra care is needed or when over-solicitousness will be unhelpful.
In our practice today we answer by our actions those questions "What’s the use? Why should I try again?" Our job is to represent humanity – to re-present humanity – we are attentive, concerned, responsive, articulate, affirming, encouraging, optimistic, teaching.
