NUMBER 1024 • 15 AUGUST •
attitude control
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How many times have we sat in a meeting only to hear a colleague say: “I can’t
help it, that’s just what I think”. How strange is this? Imagine that same staff
member coming two hours late to the meeting, explaining that although they left
in plenty of time, their legs took them to the mall! Blaming body parts for
independent action doesn’t make much sense, but is sometimes tried in an effort
to avoid responsibility. Our brain is a body part – and it does not do things
independently. The truth of the matter is that we can think whatever we want to
think. Most of those I encounter agree that the most important determinant of
working environments has less to do with the clients than with the attitudes of
those working with and around them!
The dictionary defines an attitude as a “habit of thought”. Those we describe as having a positive attitude have a tendency to think positively, even though they may have an occasional “down” day. Those with negative attitudes have developed a habit of seeing the glass as half empty. This is the same glass that others who are habitually positive would describe as half full. (The “idealist”, of course, would be grateful to have a glass, no matter how much is in it!). Attitudes do not “happen”, they are chosen. This is crucial to keep in mind whenever we find ourselves in situations where we truly don’t have control over events. In such situations, and they occur frequently in our work, the only real choice we have is to decide how we’re going to think about the situation. If our house burns down, there is really nothing to be done, other than to decide whether we’ve “lost everything”, or whether we are fortunate that we “only lost stuff” and all got out safely. We can choose whether to see the clients as deliberately operating to make us miserable, or whether to ‘see’ that most of them are doing the best they can at the moment – even if their best isn’t very good. We can see challenges as problems, or as opportunities to give, to grow, and to learn. We can decide whether to focus on what we can control or what we can’t. And although attitudes are only thoughts, they cause, and are reflected in our moods. Thus, our moods are not created by the clients, but rather by our own attitudes and how we choose to view those we have chosen to work with. We can actually choose to love them, to appreciate them, and to feel blessed by any opportunity we have to give them a chance to feel better and do better. It can actually be a huge relief to grasp that we are in charge of how we think, and how we feel, and not a bunch of “disturbed” individuals! Before we leave this most important subject, let me suggest a practical practice that can contribute to keeping our attitudes more hopeful. Monitor the discussions you have in your staff meetings to see if folks are spending inordinate amounts of time talking about situations that cannot, or will, not change. Lingering here will keep everyone down in the dumps. “Venting” – without problem solving – does not contribute to morale. Strive to keep discussions about matters out of control to a minimum, spending the majority of time on issues where you may be able to have some influence, or on issues that you know you can control. Just a suggestion. If you can’t change the wind…adjust your sails! One final suggestion in this regard, be careful about hiring those candidates who have a lot of experience, and overlooking those who might be less experienced but who might be far less jaded. To keep staff morale at its peak, remember that hiring is not about finding people with the right experience. Hire for attitude; train for skill! |
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