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28 APRIL 2010
NO 1570
On work with families
Let’s begin with these statements.
One must believe that youth belong with family, yet it has been common in many programs that youth might go home to visit only on the weekends. This used to be the case in many programs. The truth is, a philosophy of visiting home on the weekends is one of the biggest hindrances to effective family work. You do not "visit" home. Going home and being at home is not a privilege one should have to earn. It must be seen as a right and one that is essential to any program working with youth and families. In residential care we may do brilliant life-skills training, awesome art classes, exceptional group meetings, great school programs, and many other in-facility programs. All of these programs typically occur within the residential facility, however, and if all the work is done there, you are not entering the family’s world. Once you begin the transition to working with families you begin to see that it is the family home, the living room, the kitchen, the front lawn, the lobby of the apartment building, and the garage that is the center of a family’s world. This is where the stress, the hurt, and the love reside. It is where some of the best family work takes place. There is a tendency for people to want to be together only when things are going well.
We believe it is important that families leam how to be together in both good and bad times. Bringing a child back to the residential facility just because things are not going well in most cases only leads to feelings of failure for both parents and children. As much as a youth may want to return to the facility or a parent may beg you to come take their child back. it is important that family workers spend this time reaching out to the family. Help them work through these difficult times by helping them to learn to live fogether differently.
People live and change in the context of relationships (Fewster, 1990; Garfat, 1998; Krueger, 1998). Our work with youth and families focuses on how family members live in their relationships with each other. How people are with one another, the roles they adopt, the boundaries they maintain, and the care of their relationships are important to us. Relationships are in constant evolution, and family relationships change with time, circumstances, and events. This relationship evolution is a constant focus for the family worker because, as rela- tionships evolve, so does the individual’s experience of self and others. When you are with families where they live their lives, you are with them while they live their relationships.
These thoughts about relationship and process apply to all members of the family and to the relationship between the family and the family worker. Workers are also concerned with other relationships ofimportance that impact the family such as those with other professionals, community members, and extended family members. Sometimes attending to the process of relationship development is more important in helping a family to change than any specific content of discussion. Another historic pattem in many programs has been the assumption that "parents are the problem" (Fewster & Garfat, I993; Garfat & McElwee, 2001). It is our belief that in many cases parents are the key to change. They know their child better than another professional ever could. Not tapping into this resource leaves huge gaps in the information we may need to aid in the interventions we suggest. We believe most parents are doing the best they can given their available information, knowledge, and skills. With this as a base, we work on providing more information and knowledge, teaching skills, and supporting parents to feel empowered to take control of the situations within their families that are difficult for them.
The fact that a child is ‘“put into care" may appear to say clearly and loudly that the parents are not able to parent their child, even though this may not always be the case. The act of placement reinforces this perception for both child and family, making yet another obstacle for change. Ensuring that parents are consulted, empowered, and involved in every single step of life within a program helps to challenge that perception. Though we may question at times whether a parent is doing what is best for their child, in most cases what they are currently doing, their way of being together, is their best solution to their present difficulties (Durrant, 1993).
Although the saying, "it takes a village to raise a child" may seem simplistic, the root reflects the inclusiveness of systemic thinking.
It is essential to work systemically with youth and families, from using all resources from school, to friends, doctors, and other community resources in supporting change within families. Many of us have numerous experiences with youth who resided in our programs, apparently growing and changing in positive ways, only to go back home and return to the life that caused placement in the first place. We believe this is because families and other supports were not involved in the change process. Before working with families, you must develop a belief system and values that support families. Together these form a framework for a vision, and it is this vision that will guide a program in work with families. If this is not present and parents and their contributions are not valued, then change will not be successful, and parents will struggle to maintain involvement and confidence with the program.
MARK HILL AND THOM GARFAT
Hill, M. and Garfat, T. (2003). Moving to youth care
family work in residential programs: A supervisor's perspective on
making the transition. In Garfat, T. (Ed.). A Child and Youth Care
Approach to Working with Families. New York. The Haworth Press. pp.
212-214.
REFERENCES
Durrant, M. (1993). Residential treatment: A cooperative, competency-based approach to therapy and program design. New York. W.W. Norton.
Fewster, G. (1990). Being in Child Care: A Journey into Self. New York. The Haworth Press.
Fewster, G. & Garfat, T. (1993). Residential Child and Youth Care. In Denholm, C.; Ferguson R. and Pence, A. (Eds.) Professional Child and Youth Care (2nd Ed.) pp. 9-36). Vancouver, B.C. University of British Columbia Press.
Garfat, T. (1998). The effective Child and Youth Care intervention. Journal of Child and Youth Care, 12. pp. 1-178.
Garfat, T. & McElwee, N. (2001). The changing role of family in Child and Youth Care practice. Journal of Child and Youth Care Work, 15-16. pp. 236-248.
Krueger, M. (1998). Interactive youth care practice. Washington D.C. Child Welfare League of America.
